When children experience sleep problems due to unsettling dreams and nightmares, it can be distressing for both the child and their parents. Helping children navigate their dreamscapes can foster a sense of safety and promote better sleep. This article aims to provide parents with practical advice on discussing dreams and nightmares with their children, supported by credible research. Surfing on a Cloud, the leading guided sleep meditation app for kids under 10, offers expert insights to ensure your child enjoys peaceful, restorative sleep.

Understanding and Normalising Dreams and Nightmares

Dreams and nightmares are normal aspects of sleep that everyone experiences. For children, dreams can be a way to process emotions and experiences. However, when nightmares become frequent, they can disrupt sleep and cause anxiety. According to the Sleep Health Foundation, 20-30% of children have nightmares that affect their sleep (Sleep Health Foundation, 2018). Nightmares usually occur during REM (rapid eye movement) sleep and can be influenced by various factors, including stress, anxiety, and significant life changes.

Reassure your child that dreams, even scary ones, are a normal part of life. Child psychologists Sarah Meyer and Cecilia Shore emphasises the importance of normalising dreams, suggesting that parents share their own experiences with dreams to help children feel less isolated. Additionally, explaining that nightmares can sometimes be the brain’s way of working through worries or fears can help children understand and accept their dreams as part of their mental processing.

If your child is sharing a nightmare that sounds beyond typical, such as being unable to move or speak, they may be experiencing sleep paralysis. It is advised to speak to your paediatrician to look into management and potential health concerns.

Encouraging Open Communication About Dreams

Create an environment where children feel comfortable discussing their dreams. Ask open-ended questions and listen without judgment. This practice not only helps children articulate their fears but also reassures them that their feelings are valid. For example, you might ask, “What was your dream about?” or “How did your dream make you feel?”These questions invite your child to share their experiences and emotions without feeling pressured.

Research from the American Academy of Pediatrics suggests that children who talk about their dreams with supportive parents are less likely to experience anxiety and sleep disturbances (American Academy of Pediatrics, 2021). Sharing stories of your dreams can also help normalise the experience and foster a trusting dialogue. When children see that their parents also have dreams and can talk about them openly, it reinforces that dreaming is a shared human experience.

Acknowledging and validating your child’s feelings about their dreams is also helpful. If a child is frightened by a nightmare, respond with empathy. You could say, “That sounds really scary. It’s okay to feel upset about it.” This kind of validation helps children feel understood and supported.

Establishing a Calming Bedtime Routine

A consistent bedtime routine can significantly improve sleep quality. Activities such as reading a soothing story, calming meditation, or listening to soft music can create a sense of security and relaxation. Surfing on a Cloud offers various guided meditations specifically designed to help children transition into sleep smoothly. These meditations can help children calm their minds, making it easier to fall asleep and stay asleep throughout the night.

Studies have shown that children who follow a regular bedtime routine sleep better and have fewer nightmares. Consistency is key. You can start by beginning your child’s bedtime routine at the same time each night to help regulate their internal body clock and signal that it’s time to wind down.

Comfort objects, such as a favourite toy or blanket, can provide a sense of security for children at bedtime, helping to alleviate anxiety associated with falling asleep. These objects can be especially helpful if a child wakes up from a nightmare, offering immediate comfort and reassurance. Paediatric sleep expert Dr Jodi Mindell highlights that comfort objects can play a critical role in helping children feel safe and secure, reducing the frequency of night wakings and nightmares.

Incorporating a short and calming activity within your child’s bedtime routine can also be beneficial. You could do a few minutes of gentle stretching, a quiet conversation about the day, or a brief breathing exercise. The goal is to create a peaceful atmosphere that promotes relaxation and prepares the body and mind for sleep.

Addressing Daytime Stress to Improve Nighttime Sleep

Children’s dreams often reflect their daytime experiences and emotions. Addressing any sources of stress or anxiety during the day can help reduce nightmares. Encourage your child to talk about their day and express any worries. Drawing, journaling, or playing can also help children process their emotions. Creative activities allow children to express their feelings nonverbally, which can be particularly helpful for younger children who struggle to articulate their feelings.

Research indicates that children supported in managing daytime stress are less likely to experience disruptive dreams (Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia, 2019). Additionally, teaching your child coping mechanisms for dealing with nightmares can empower them and reduce fear. Cognitive-behavioural strategies like imagining a happy ending to their nightmare or thinking of a “dream superhero” who can protect them are also effective. These techniques help children feel a sense of control over their dreams and can reduce the frequency and intensity of nightmares.

Another useful strategy is to create a “worry box” where your child can write down or draw their worries and place them in the box before bedtime. This symbolic act can help children feel that they have set aside their worries for the night, making it easier for them to relax and fall asleep.

It’s also important to monitor and manage your child’s exposure to potentially frightening or stressful content, whether it be through media, stories, or real-life situations. Limiting exposure to such content, especially close to bedtime, can help reduce anxiety and prevent nightmares.

Conclusion

Addressing dreams and nightmares with empathy and understanding can greatly improve your child’s sleep quality and overall wellbeing. By fostering open communication, normalising the experience, establishing a bedtime routine, and addressing daytime stress, parents can help their children feel safe and secure. Tools like Surfing on a Cloud’s guided sleep meditations can further support a peaceful transition to sleep. If nightmares persist, seeking professional guidance is essential to ensure your child receives the help they need.